Thomas was a divided man. He worked in middle management, and wasn’t
happy. The work bored him and he didn’t get on with his colleagues. To
remedy this he’d applied for a similar job with another firm. When he told
his boss he was leaving he was immediately offered a promotion. Now he was
thrown. There were pros and cons on both sides: the new firm offered the
opportunity of new colleagues, and possibly more stimulating work, but the
promotion also offered a different type of work, along with a hefty pay
rise.
THE BREAKTHROUGH
We had only had two sessions. Thirty minutes into the first session the
confusion was made clear. The subconscious feelings lurking beneath the
big decision came forward. Thomas was plagued with low confidence, not
believing that he could have or deserved fulfillment in his life. So he
set himself very low standards of satisfaction.
He secretly longed for it all, job satisfaction and job security. But
because he hadn’t felt worthy, he didn’t try to get them. Once Thomas saw
why he was doing what he was doing, everything suddenly became clear. He
realised that his big decision wasn’t a big decision at all. Neither
option appealed to him really, which is why he’d had such a hard time
choosing.
THE RESULT
Freed from the traps of his subconscious Thomas started pursuing a
fulfilling life with some gusto. Very soon nothing could hold him back! He
applied for radically different jobs, things that excited him and provided
for his family. With ever increasing levels of self-esteem Thomas did
brilliantly in interviews and was soon offered a job he happily accepted.
How Pam finally found her
favourite flavour of Ice Cream
THE BEGINNING
Pam’s boyfriend had just proposed. But she hadn’t been sure for years
whether or not she really wanted to be with him. She loved him, but just
didn’t know if he was ‘the one’. Her endless reasoning wasn’t producing a
decision. And the decision certainly wasn’t making itself.
THE BREAKTHROUGH
We soon saw that it wasn’t only big decisions Pam couldn’t make. She even
had trouble choosing a flavour of ice cream, or a chocolate bar.
It was clear that Pam had very low self-confidence, and even lower
self-awareness. She was a people pleaser, had always made decisions from
the point of view of others, or let them make decisions for her. Of course
she was left with no idea of what she really wanted in life, or love.
So we set about the exciting journey of ‘finding herself’. We started with
the ice cream….
THE RESULTS
Good decisions make themselves, when you don’t have an invisible barrier
stopping them. When Pam discovered who she really was, separate from the
opinions and feelings of others, she knew exactly what to do. She realised
she’d spent her adult life hiding in relationships, scared of being left
with herself, a self she didn’t know.
But now she loved herself and discovered all kinds of things she wanted to
do, some of them alone! Her boyfriend understood, and happily gave her the
space to take a job abroad for six months. When they came back together
Pam had truly found herself, and was ready to share that new self with her
partner!
How Thomas chose between
two job offers