GLOWING CONFIDENCE STORIES

How Jenny stopped living with ‘shoulds’ and started living her own way

THE BEGINNING

Jenny was very low. She didn’t like her job. She didn’t like being single. She didn’t like her messy home. She had no social life, no sense of fun. She constantly felt like she was racing against the clock. She always felt frustrated, disappointed but too overwhelmed to want to do anything about it.

THE BREAKTHROUGH

We instantly discovered that Jenny’s life was full of ‘shoulds’ and ‘oughts’. No wonder she resisted her life. And underneath all of this frustration she had enormous energy and passion. But because it wasn’t finding expression, Jenny was left feeling empty and unfulfilled.

The route out was to drop the ‘shoulds’ and find her own agenda, built on what she really wanted. As soon as we did this, Jenny became highly motivated.

THE RESULTS

Jenny stopped imposing other people’s agendas on herself. This brought a great sense of peace. She soon re-discovered fun, and began dating again. She allowed herself to really enjoy it, rather than being plagued by the ‘task’ of finding Mr Right. She left her job and set up her own business, something she’d always wanted, but never allowed herself to indulge in. It soon became a great success. Her levels of self-esteem soared, and life became a pleasure.

How Sylvia found the Meaning of True Confidence

THE BEGINNING

Sylvia had very low levels of confidence and self-esteem. And she hated herself for it. She constantly berated herself whenever she didn’t speak up at work, when she let her bosses dominate her, and her colleagues take advantage of her. Sylvia was desperate to be different, but she didn’t know how.

THE BREAKTHROUGH

But underneath her desire to be confident Sylvia was actually terrified of being just that. She’d grown up being told that modesty was a crucial quality to being loved and accepted. And so Sylvia acted this out in adult life by deeply disliking confident people, whom she regarded as arrogant.

This confusion between true confidence and brashness had lead Sylvia to reject confidence. So while she consciously desired it, subconsciously she would never allow herself to be it.

The way out was to explore Sylvia’s own brand of confidence, which would never look like loudness. Now free from her subconscious blocks, Sylvia’s own brand of confidence emerged. She also learned to stop beating herself up, because she now knew what had really been going on. She hadn’t spent her life being ‘weak’ or ‘pathetic’; she’d simply been a slave to her unconscious mind.

THE RESULTS

Free now to choose her own path, Sylvia found it easy to stand up for herself. She wasn’t confrontational, but beautifully confident. She used this new confidence to take care of herself, and recognise her own value. Those around her quickly picked up on this and she was soon promoted.

This confidence flooded over into her personal life, and now, free from self-attack, Sylvia is embracing life with a level of fun and pleasure she never thought possible!

How Rachel Healed Herself and watched her Life Transform Around Her

THE BEGINNING

Rachel was 55 and had been married for 25 years. Her husband took her completely for granted, and her children were often verbally abusive. Rachel felt desperately unhappy, unfulfilled, down-trodden and unimportant. She’d felt that way for as long as she could remember. She constantly fantasized about leaving her marriage, and truly believed that escaping her circumstances was the only was she could feel powerful and significant again.

THE BREAKTHROUGH

It quickly became apparent that Rachel had always equated loving someone with putting their needs first. She’d never experienced an equal loving partnership where both people take care of themselves and each other.

We explored the idea of true partnership, and how it requires self-love and respecting ones own needs. In this way the love of others becomes a wonderful bonus, rather than a necessary replacement for our own lack of esteem.

With this internal shift as a trigger, Rachel quickly started making other shifts. She started to take care of herself. She started to do things that she enjoyed. She started to look for fulfillment, instead of waiting for it to find her. She found that empowerment wasn’t as hard as she’d thought.

THE RESULTS

Rachel was shocked to discover that once she changed, those around her changed too! When they saw her as someone who respected herself, they behaved with respect. When they saw her as someone who loved herself, they saw someone to love. Appreciation, fun and partnership soon grew in the family.

And Rachel realised that changing the external circumstances- leaving her family – wouldn’t have solved the real problem, which was how to feel both loved and powerful. Once she could do that, she could do anything!